Not yet
by aza004
Summary: "For what I know, dozens already paid you a visit to see your current condition after your one week coma, even Lindow did. But-." he held up a finger and waved it at my face. "A certain Russian God Eater clad in red and black never did." / -Oneshot- / A bit of OcXAlisa.. :)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: And~..me is back..nyehehe..probably my fastest update so far..and I'm still fixated on the OCxAlisa pairing, still having no clue on how long is this fondness of mine is gonna last.. :D**

**Just something I came up and after the "True Moon in the Welkin" mission..written in Raiga's POV..enjoy~.. ^-^)v**

**PS: I'm really excited for the anime this summer season.. xD**

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**Disclaimer: I only own my OC.. :3**

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"Dude." Kota said nonchalantly as he flipped a page of his comic book.

"Yeah?." I glanced at the guy next to me with a bored look. Who wouldn't? Kota's stuck with me before he goes home. I've been in the infirmary for a week, still not allow to go out and can only walk around the room, sit or lie down in the bed. This will probably teach me to _never ever _use somebody else's God Arc if in case that I don't want to literally die or die out of boredom. Oh wait, make that two weeks of being admitted. It _has_ been a week since I regained consciousness after the last mission.

"Alisa." he flipped another page without meeting my gaze. "Tell me, you like her don't you?" his question made me sprang up from bed

"Wa- wa- what are you talking about?!" I stammered, feeling my face getting hotter. Kota raised a brow at me.

"Relax dude." chuckling lightly as Kota shook his head. "Also, don't worry. I'm not planning to get on _your_ way."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I grumbled audibly.

"I mean.." he stopped with a sigh as he closes the comic. "I'll admit she's cute and us being friends is a plus, but for me that's that. There's a line that I'm not interested of crossing." discarding the comic book on the nightstand beside my bed, with me gulping mentally. "Don't get off topic now Raiga."

"You already said it yourself Kota, she's cute." I said with fake confidence. "Try to find someone in the Den's male population who'll disagree with that." in which, he only narrowed his eyes at me. He definitely finds this suspicious._'Oh dear.'_

"I'm not joking dude, I demand for an answer." Kota propped his elbow on his knee, before resting the side of his face in the back of his hand. "This'll be between just us, I'm just curious on how you see her." his brown eyes looking at me with a smile.

I heaved a deep sigh after I saw the look on Kota's eye. I can tell him almost everything when he puts up that face. Maybe I could, we're in a private room anyway. "I think-" I answered before leaning on the head board. "I think it grew stronger." I muttered the last part.

* * *

"What? You having a crush on her?" I nodded.

"Wait-..was it really that obvious?" I gaped.

"For me, not at first." Kota shrugged. "I do find it funny when Alisa was first introduced as a new member of our Unit. I actually stole a glance at everyone and found your eyes tripled it's size." he laughed.

"No, I did not!"

"Yes, you did. You and _your_ pale blue eyes were checking her out." pointing a finger at me.

"You know it's rare to see a foreigner at this age!" I defended. Even though, my face probably had all the answers.

"I win. You're blushing badly so drop it off Raiga." he sighed out of defeat. "I knew it when I saw the way you look at her. I don't know why but you're eyes show it. It gives off a different gleam when you're with her." my temperature again rising when Kota wiggled his eyebrows playfully. After a small laugh as he embarrass me, he continued "After a while I told myself. _'Ahh, maybe Raiga has a thing for Alisa.' _especially, after knowing that there are times that both of you still sneak out in the roof in the middle of the night." his smile getting wider.

"What are you even getting at?" I narrowed my eyes at him.

"Fine." Kota pouted. "Just want to lighten you up for a bit. Been down as what I could see." smacking my shoulder with a laugh.

"Right. You bringing up the topic of my personal life is not helping." I said, frowning.

"So you admit?" Kota started grinning again.

"Shut up." I hissed.

"Ahww, come on Raiga. I know you are." he cooed. "For what I know, dozens already paid you a visit to see your current condition after your one week coma, even Lindow did. But-." he held up a finger and waved it at my face. "A certain Russian God Eater clad in red and black never did."

_'Why I oughta.'_

"Your brows are twitching~." Kota mocked, the grin still plastered on his features.

"Fine! You got me!" I exclaimed. "I'm a bit upset with her for not giving me a visit okay?!" flailing my arms in front of Kota. "Happy?" I sighed, crossing my arms.

"Not quite answered my actual question though." Kota answered after a few blinks.

"You were right about it." I admitted with a sigh of defeat. "I find my self attracted to her ever since the first meeting. Then after some 'stuff', I started to question myself: _'Why do I always find myself getting drawn to her?'._" a dry laugh managed to get out from my throat as I looked at Kota. "I was dead wrong when I thought that the main reason was because of us being paired through resonance. I was blaming that phenomenon at first but in truth, it was very simple. The more I get to know her, the more my attraction to Alisa grew into something else."

"Meaning?" he asked, as if Kota doesn't have a single clue on what I've said.

"Aaargh!" I snapped. Lying down on the bed and scratching my head frustratingly. "I like her, a lot." I spat.

"No need to panic though, I think only a few knows your secret." Kota gave another shrug. "Soma? No idea, but Sakuya catches your hint. And-.." I let my blue eyes stare at him hopefully. "Nope, I don't think _she_ knows."

"Good." letting out a breath that I was holding.

* * *

"So?" my orange haired friend chimed. "What's your next step?"

Shaking my head for a bit "Not yet." I sighed. "I don't think I'm ready to tell her." I frowned at his grin.

"Whatever you say, Leader." he smiled with triumph. "Better hurry though, you know you're probably not the only one who has their eyes on her. Especially, when those dolts discovers that-" he held the pinky on his left hand up. "Both of you are not actually together."

"Then I'll let those _dolts_ deal with me before they can even lay a finger on her." I joked with a fake glare.

"I'll be on your back if when that happens." Kota added with a laugh. "Wanna see her?" he quirked a brow at me.

"I'll be lying if I tell you that I don't." I stated dryly.

"Why don't you go then?" Kota threw something in my face. "Got you a duplicate."

Picking it up, it was a card that I was familiar with. "A card key? For the roof?" I asked.

"Correcto." Kota beamed a big smile at me. "She's been worried like everyone else. I know she has a reason but, I don't know what goes in her head why she still refuses to see you." he started scratching the back of his head. "I just don't know if she'll be sneaking out tonight though. I knew she did the other night."

I nodded in approval. "It's fine. Then it's either I'll wait for the rest of the night in the rooftop or force myself in her room. I don't know how long my sanity can last if I don't see her tonight." I grinned.

"That's the spirit." he laughed as he stood up. "I better get going Raiga, sorry."

"Come on, what you're doing is more than enough Kota, thanks." holding up the card that he just gave me. Seriously, I don't know how can I repay him for all of this..

"Sakuya's gonna be in charge for tonight. You can easily get through if you tell your intentions." slowly making his way towards the door. "Better tell me what happens when I get back." Kota gave a wave.

"Maybe I will." I waved back before the door closed.

* * *

I never wanted to go back to that place. Dark, soundless, cold, and no presence of life. That's what I can remember when I was drifting on my one week coma. I really thought back then that I'll be swallowed whole before coming to my senses. Thankful that I was alive and well in reality. Thankful for getting another chance in life. If what I've seen back then was death, I can say..

It was terrifying.

Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes. The vast canvass illuminated by stars met my vision. I couldn't help cracking a smile, I don't know if the cause was the chilly breeze or the way the stars lit up the night sky. But tonight's ambience actually reminds me of the first time that we snuck out here together.

_'This is bad.' _I thought as I gave a small laugh. Just thinking about seeing her makes me excited and nervous at the same time. I placed my right hand to my chest just to be sure. _'Yep, this is really bad.' _my pulse is currently doubled than its usual pace.

"Dammit!" hissing as I sat up, scratching the sides of my head. The blanket that Sakuya lent me that I used as a mat substitute crumpled a bit on my sudden movement. "Focus Raiga, focus." I chanted to calm my nerves, burying my face in my hands frustratingly. I couldn't afford to be a nervous wreck right now. What if- what if resonance kick in and all these emotions leak out?

_'Is she coming over here in the first place?' _that particular question rang in my mind. Sliding the hand down from my face, my eyes landed on the door that haven't even budged for the past hour.

_"It's fine. Then it's either I'll wait for the rest of the night in the rooftop or force myself in her room. I don't know how long my sanity can last if I don't see her tonight."_

I did say something as stupid like that didn't I? I was being honest though. I want to see Alisa, _badly_. Heck, even just a glimpse will do right now.

Alisa's the main reason that I'm fixated on living right now. During the time that I was surrounded by that darkness, I actually prayed desperately. A bit of a selfish prayer to be exact if I can recall correctly..

_'No, not yet. Not this time, please give me another chance..'_

I breathed. "Five." I started to count, readying myself to get my butt out of here. Sitting or lying down might not be advisable for this night.

_'I wanted to see her.'_

"Four."

_'I want to have her voice ring in my ears again.'_

"Three."

_'I want to see that smile that never fails to brighten me up.'_

"Two."

_'I want to fulfill the promise that I made under the starry sky.'_

"One."

_'Please..let me stay by her side.'_

"Zero." I finished.

As if on cue, the door slid open before I could even lift a finger. I closed my eyes knowing who could that be.

* * *

_Step. Step. Step.._

My ears knew those light footsteps anywhere, be it if she's wearing her heeled boots or that pink, fuzzy slippers that she had that she hides under her bed whenever Kota comes to her room.

"Yoh." I greeted as I opened my eyes. Tilting my head up to look at those indigo eyes that I grew fond of. "Surprised?" I asked with a wide, playful grin.

She blinked a few seconds after looking at me with eyes widened by surprise. Trying to open her mouth to speak but immediately shuts her lips and looked away to avoid my gaze. Alisa just stood, and clutched the hem of the blue oversized hoodie that she dons. It actually belonged to me but decided to let her keep it after I lent it to her once.

"Ahh..you didn't even check up on me while everyone else did." I faked a disappointed sigh. "I find it a bit cold hearted you know?" she still haven't budged, only biting her lower lip.

"Ms. Amiella." I called. _'Now..I feel guilty.' _groaning mentally when she slowly looked up to me with glossy eyes. Sighing, I chose the best move that I can think of right now. "Care to sit down with me?" I beamed, patting a spot next to me. Actually thankful that the only light source in here were the stars, I don't know what to do with the blush on my face when a small smile formed on her lips.

There was a lot that I wanted to ask her. What was running on her mind during the time that I was out? She's not lurking on Sakuya's room and drowns herself with coffee right? She's well and eats properly right? There were so many questions that I wanted to ask but I find myself enjoying the silence between the two us.

Maybe, I'll ask her some later time..or maybe not. I'm actually thinking of dropping it off. The way she leans on my shoulder, the smile on her face as she hums a tune. Practically, all of her tells me one thing right now. And the feeling's mutual:

_'I'm glad to see you again.'_

Also, I decided that night. If the heaven's are willing to grant another selfish request of mine, I actually have one..

"I wish that this _'friendship'_ of ours could grow into something else."

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**A/N: Done..thanks for the read..reviews are appreciated btw..hehehe.. :D**

**I'm actually cracking for another chapter for this..in Alisa's POV..still not sure but if I'll be able to work on that one..then, I'll have it uploaded once done.**

**Anyways, bye for now~.. ^-^)v**

_**_aza**_


	2. Chapter 2

**a/n: the anime adaptation is near~!..hahaha..**

**and..it _was _not sure but i managed to make a 2nd chp for this..hahaha.. xD**

**it took me a while, but this is longer than Raiga's side[4,033 words w/o this a/n]..and this is not on a 1st person POV..**

**PS: i picture Lindow like an older brother of some sort. enjoy folks.. ^-^)v**

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**Disclaimer: I only own my OC**

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"Spacing out again, I see." said a voice that made the other jump out of surprise from her train of thoughts.

It took a couple of blinks for Alisa to compose herself. A mug was already placed in front of her before she could even respond. "Sorry." she muttered apologetically to the older female who sat beside her. "I was just thinking about some things Sakuya." she took the mug and drank a portion of the warm beverage.

"Hmm.." Sakuya's crimson eyes narrowed suspiciously at the silver haired teen, not missing the bags beneath her eyes. "You know.." she started, crossing her legs as she stares at Alisa who raised a curious brow. "I think inviting you here for coffee was a _bad_ idea."

"Care to state the reason?" the younger God Eater sighed with disappointment.

"Its not that I don't like your company Alisa, I'm just worried." Sakuya stopped and looked at her companion who tries to take a sip from the mug. "Are you really that distracted enough to the point that you can't distinguish coffee and plain old water?"

"W-what?" indigo eyes widening as she stammered. Alisa slowly glanced down to the mug's content, groaning from embarrassment and disbelief as she placed the ceramic ware down.

Her drink _was_ only water. Not the bitter, dark tinted beverage she got accustomed in Sakuya's room. Her hands finding its place on her lap as she heaved an exhausted sigh.

"Sorry." Sakuya said between her giggles. "I didn't mean to play a trick on you. I told you earlier Alisa, I'm worried." taking one of Alisa's hand for comfort. "The way you act for the last few days, you're distracting yourself." Sakuya smiled inwardly when she felt how Alisa's body tensed. Alisa can be a little obvious at times.

"Alisa." Sakuya's tone changed to a stern one, seeing how the teen refused to respond. "You know your condition, and what you're doing is unhealthy."

"Thanks for reminding me that I'm emotionally weaker than everyone else." the teen retorted sarcastically. After a while, she sighed and leaned on Sakuya's shoulder. "I don't like this." Alisa complained, closing her eyes as she makes herself comfortable in Sakuya's shoulder. "I don't like what I'm feeling..it hurts." she added, giving Sakuya's hand a squeeze.

Laughing softly as she rests her head top on Alisa's. "Say, Alisa?"

"Hmm?" the younger God Eater hummed.

"I'll be checking up on Raiga later, wanna tag along with me and Lindow once he gets back?" the older female asked. Almost forgetting the fact that they will be checking up on the blue haired teen after her lover's errand.

"As much as I would like to. Most are prohibited in his room right now." said a voice from behind, surprising both.

"Except for some." the man named Lindow Amamiya grinned. "Hey, hey.." raising his hands out of defeat seeing Sakuya's glare. "I'm serious, Tsubaki's calling for you." brows furrowing as he looked directly in her eyes. "A. S. A. P."

"Don't tell me-" Sakuya sprang up from her seat in a matter of seconds. "I'll see you around." smiling as she gave a pat on Alisa's shoulder before dashing out of the room.

* * *

Alisa was not quite sure if she was just tired or it was just her imagination that the air in the room became somewhat thick after Sakuya left. Why? She was left alone with none other than Lindow Amamiya. Their former Unit Leader and someone she still needs to ask forgiveness from.

"I-..I'll be t-taking my leave." Alisa wanted to smack herself for fidgeting.

"Whoa, whoa, easy there tigress." Lindow grinned when the silver haired God Eater flinched when he sat next to her in the couch. "I could use some company for a while." leaning his back comfortably on the leather surface. Raising a curious brow when he saw Alisa averting her gaze from him.

"Hey..I know one of my arms looks weird but I'm not all in all _that_ scary right?" Lindow comically waved his oracle cell infected arm. "Okay." he sighed, knowing that the girl would not speak right now. "Sakuya, you know she's worried about you. If something's troubling you, needs advice or just wanted someone to talk to..she's one of the best options. Best listener I've ever known."

"I can handle it." Alisa almost mumbled. "Do you even know it's bad to eavesdrop?" she then stated coldly.

"I was your former Leader, of course I'll worry about my team." Lindow was scratching his head, already having an idea where this is leading to. "Then.." the male started. He wanted to help. He knew both he and Alisa started with the wrong foot. The girl still might be blaming herself because of what happened before even if he doesn't care about the past. This might be a harsh approach but Lindow knew, this will make her speak up and drop the facade. This is not the girl that was with Sakuya earlier.

"Do you trust them?"

"Excuse me?" she quirked a brow.

"Do you even trust your team in the first place?" Lindow proceeded, seeing the uncertainty in the girl's posture. "I've been hearing things about you." chuckling lowly. "She's like this, she's like that-..all of them were talking positively about you. But-.." he sighed as he eyes the young girl. "For me you haven't changed at all. Still someone who couldn't care less, someone who thinks making friends is a bother and thinks that teamwork is a very big nuisance."

"Don't talk to me like that." glaring at their former Leader, the hands on her lap started trembling. Unwanted memories rushing back in her mind.

"Ohh." Lindow taunted. "Affected aren't ya? Tell me, how does it feel to point a gun at your colleague?"

"Stop!-" Alisa's voice boomed together with the sound of shattering glass. Looking down where she slammed her left after a few raspy breaths, shards of ceramic drenched in the mixture of water and her own blood welcomed her sight. Having no idea, she ended up laughing as she unclenched her fist. Not minding the droplets of blood coming out from the cuts nor the stings coming from them. This is nothing compared to the pain in her chest.

"Happy you get to see me like this?" asking sarcastically and never dared to look at Lindow. But she was caught off guard when a cloth was gently wrapped around her bleeding hand. With tears threatening to spill when a hand was placed on top of her head.

"Relax for a while okay?" he said softly as he gave her a small pat. A small smile crept up to Lindow's features when the girl gave a small nod.

* * *

"Sure there's no more left?" Lindow asked with a pout, tending to Alisa's hand after he cleaned up the mess. Wanting to make sure that there is zero shards of ceramic ware beneath the blood in her hands, he saw how the Russian God Eater winced when he was helping her remove her glove off..he should've realize sooner to just cut the leather off. It was a really good thing that Sakuya's also a medic, that meant his lover has medical supplies that he can use in time's need.

Alisa shook her head in response, though, enough to make Lindow smile inwardly. At least she's properly responding unlike earlier.

Seeing that the bleeding stopped "Good." he then used another cloth to wipe the blood off from her hands. "Sakuya will kill me if something happened to you because of me." he mumbled while applying anti-septic on the cuts.

"Really now?" letting out a small laugh of amusement as she watched Lindow's hands work. "I thought she was going to kill me after what I've done..to you."

"Hundred percent sure." Lindow's shoulder sagged a bit when he sighed. "The way things are right now, I'm pretty sure that she'll take your side in case we got in some kind of argument." he chuckled. "She said that you're like a sister that she never had." looking upto her with a smile.

Blinking, Alisa averted her gaze and sighed. "That was really nice to hear though. But I'm not sure if she's gonna side on me on our earlier ranting."

"Stop thinking about that." the male grabbed the roll of bandage. "I was at fault for sticking my nose, you don't need to talk about it if you don't want to."

"I feel like there's a hole in my chest lately." Alisa started. "I don't know what caused this but it hurts so much, I don't know what to do." her eyes then dimmed with sadness. "And, now that it's uncertain for Leader to come back..I don't want to drag anyone else down thinking that this is a big case." that statement made Lindow's eyebrows quirked.

_"But the kid's not.._" telling himself mentally. He was amused that Alisa was actually opening up to him, but for Lindow it seems that she misunderstood one important thing. Regardless to it, he decided to play along for a while. "So, you don't want to speak up to the rest of your I mean, our team. Except for Raiga? Does that mean you give him much more of your trust than anyone else?" Lindow grinned uncontrollably seeing how the red hue spreads across the younger God Eater's face. He can sense something about this.

Almost yanking her hand from Lindow's grasp "N-no!" Alisa stammered, the blush still visible. "T-that's not.." she stopped with a sigh, knowing that she could trust Lindow like the rest of her team. "I'm just used to have one person on talking my troubles with." she declared but Lindow continues on listening while wrapping the bandage on her hand. "I don't want to be a bother to anyone else." shaking her head for a bit. "That's why..I decided to keep it bottled up to myself."

"Well.." Lindow stopped and tied a secure knot for the bandage to keep its place. "There are things that you can figure out by 'feeling', rather by thinking about it. If you know what I mean" he scowled, seeing how the girl tilted her head, with that innocent look on her face. Reaching the 'mutated' arm out he flicked her in the forehead, making her yelp. "It means, don't think too much. I know you're smart but don't use your head all the time, if that's what you want me to say." he sighed out of defeat.

"Also." Lindow continued. "It's nice for you to have a close friend you can talk all your troubles to. But don't forget that there are ones left that can listen as well in case of one's absence. Unfortunately, that's not gonna be applicable for you right now." smiling as he saw the curious look on Alisa's face. "Raiga's not going nowhere."

"B-but..isn't he-" Alisa almost whispered.

"Nope." he gave her another flick. "He woke up, Tsubaki asked for Sakuya to check up on him." Lindow's words rendered the girl speechless, but the joy and excitement twinkling in her purple eyes never missed his sight.

"Alisa?"

"Yes?"

"I may be late to say this but.." placing his left hand on top of her head again as he smiled. Lindow was not sure if this can at least take a load off from her shoulder, but he wanted to say this personally since he had the chance. Making sure that he's looking at her straight in the eye, he started. "I know we didn't have a good start. But what happened back there, forget about it. I know you're still blaming yourself on what I've become now so stop. I know you've suffered enough already. I just wanted to tell you that..I forgive you. I never hated nor blamed you for it, even so.." he stopped, the color draining out of his face when he saw the tears from her eyes.

Alisa blinked and wondered why Lindow stopped. It took her a couple of seconds to realize the tears going down her cheeks. "Oh, sorry." she laughed, using the back of her hand to wipe the tears. "It's j-just that..I'm happy a-and.." she choked, fighting the urge to sob and cry in front of Lindow. She was then pulled up into an embrace, although not as gentle as Raiga's that she was used to, it was still comforting nonetheless.

With trembling hands gripping Lindow's coat "Thank you." Alisa breathed before letting the tears fall down with her sobs barely audible in the room as she was held closer.

* * *

"What is really wrong with me?" Alisa grumbled, burying her face on the pillow as she lies down with her stomach.

"Come on." she started talking to herself, lifting her head and lazily rests her chin on the oversized plush. "Sakuya forbade you to take on any mission and she told you to relax. Heck, you even drank that glass of warm milk Lindow gave you." her brow twitched remembering the mocking grin in Lindow's face when she pouted on the contents of her mug during her visit to Sakuya's room. She didn't even know why she felt obliged to take it instead of asking for something different.

"Besides.." she breathed, glancing at her left hand that was now bruised free, it has been days ever since. "Leader's awake. You shouldn't worry that much anymore." Alisa couldn't help but to grimace, since she hasn't set foot ever since that day, not even on the times that Raiga was not during his coma.

"So why can't you get a decent amount of sleep?" she whined as she buries her head again. Already feeling frustated, it's been a while since she got a full eight hours of sleep, her normal shut-eye duration recently only last an hour to three a day.

She hated this..when did this started happening? It hasn't been always like this. It was faint, barely even there then all of the sudden it burst out and became something so painful. Although thankful that the pain miraculously disappeared, it still haven't completely left. Correction, that 'barely-even-there' feeling became to somewhat of emptiness after all that pain. It's already taking a toll on her without even knowing the reason for it.

_"There are things that you can figure out by 'feeling', rather by thinking about it."_

"I am.." she gripped the sheets with her hands. "I'm trying." she has been trying to _'feel'_ as what Lindow suggested.

Knowing that she will not be falling asleep any minute, Alisa heaved an exhausted sigh while glancing at the nightstand beside her bed. It was the bottle of pills Sakuya gave for her insomnia. Deciding not to take one even if she look awful with those bags beneath her eyes, she can already imagine her hideous appearance without even the help of a mirror.

_"Maybe some fresh air will do." _thinking as she clicked her tongue. Her mind working and decided to go with her latest routine. The rooftop. Alisa grabbed the card key next to the medicine bottle as she got up from bed. The girl facepalming when she saw that her pajamas are not gonna be enough from the night breeze.

Turning her heel and she quickly opened her wardrobe. Indigo eyes immediately landing on one of the biggest article of clothing that she possess. Something that didn't originally belonged to her.

* * *

"Leader.." the sound escaped from her lips almost resembled a small cry.

Here she was, a lone figure sitting on the concrete floor. Here she was, trying to figure out this feeling in her chest that's been bothering her. Here she was, all huddled up, deciding to hug instead of wearing the blue hooded jacket. Not even minding to look up at the illuminated sky that normally helps clearing up her mind.

"What do you think I should do?" asking no one in particular. "You know me better than myself Raiga." Alisa held the jacket tighter. "Tell me? What should I do to make this sensation stop?"

She knew no one will answer, Alisa just wanted to somehow express herself. She has no one right now she can lash all this questions and frustrations out. Alisa made it clear to Lindow back then, she's not yet comfortable around them to tell it all. She knew it will come eventually, but now..

Alisa wanted to see a particular person, at the same time she doesn't. Another thing that adds to her confusion. Raiga's one of her friends right? And despite that she didn't want to admit..the blue haired teen already held a special place in her. So what is it that's keeping her? Was it because she wasn't able to do anything for Raiga back then that she's afraid to face him?

Was she being too dependent and someone who always need a shoulder to lead on? Alisa knew by herself that it's not. If that's the case, there are her other friends that would with wide open arms..so why? Why is it? That in the back of her mind..no matter how much she wants to bury the thought, she's longing to see Raiga. Wanting to spend the night with him beneath the starry sky.

_"I'll never leave you, no matter what. No matter how many times you push me away, I'll step into your life over and over. I'll pull you out every time you fell in that pit of darkness. I promise."_

Ahh, right..how could she forget his promise back then? Back then when she was on the stage of recovering, she tried to isolate herself again from everyone else. Then, out of the blue, Raiga let out a promise that almost made her cry. How long has it been since she felt that she was given importance? How long has it been that someone actually cared for her after her parent's death? How could she forget? How he spoke with a voice that ringed pleasantly on her ears, how his blue eyes shone brightly like the stars above. That's what made this place special to her. That's what made _him_ special to her.

"I see." Alisa let out a laugh while looking upto the sky. "You are at fault for the mess I am right now." closing her eyes, letting herself engulfed as the night breeze blew gently. "Raiga." a smile forming on her lips.

It just somehow clicked. Alisa's still not sure what this is..but she knew. She now knew what's causing this nagging feeling inside her. The sudden pain, the emptiness, she had an idea but she still doesn't think that this is final. The reason why she felt so lost, just because of someone's absence.

"It's no wonder if it's gonna be Raiga right?" she whispered to herself with a small laugh.

* * *

"Lindow.."

"Nngh.." he grumbled on his half-awake state.

"Someone's at the door." Sakuya ordered him indirectly.

Opening his eyes, he looked at the time. Past three in the morning. Sighing as he untangled his left arm around his lover's waist, Lindow proceeded in putting a shirt on before answering the door. "Who the heck could this be?" he grumbled under his breath as he scratches his head.

A silver blur entered his line of vision upon having the door open. Next thing Lindow knew, he was sitting on the floor, his butt now feeling the jolt upon landing on it.

Yawning as their bedroom door closed with a hiss, he glanced down. "Can't sleep tigress?" a sleepy smile getting wider seeing as the girl has her arms wrapped around his waist.

"I think I figured it out, somehow." Alisa added with hesitation. Having no intention of looking up to their former Leader. Afraid if there's a blush across her face right now.

"Ohh?" Lindow chimed. "You're not mistaking it of being dependent to one person?" he could feel the arms tighten around his waist.

"No." her voice being muffled by Lindow's shirt. "You said I had the whole Team if I need a shoulder to lean on. But I can tell, this was different in a way." Alisa looked upto him this time, indigo eyes resembling those of a helpless puppy.

"It's not bad if I were to fall in love right?"

Lightly laughing, Lindow placed his left hand on top of Alisa's head. "It's actually one of the best things that could happen in your life." grinning triumphantly as he could.

"So you knew?" Alisa asked with a pout. "Ugh, I hate this." lowering her head with a small grumble.

"Oh, come on. I just happen to have a strong gut feeling about it." he started patting Alisa's head playfully. "And please.." the older male stopped, leaving Alisa hanging.

"Don't ever use that face again..it's deadly." remembering her pleading eyes just a while back. "I bet you can kill everybody with that."

"I'm tired." Alisa breathed, finally getting the feeling of her eyes getting heavier with each passing second.

"Go on. Sleep, I don't mind." Lindow continues on petting her head.

It took a while before Lindow felt the girl's arms relaxed and her breathing on a steady pace. Looking back with a smile, he saw Sakuya crouched down and is actually looking at him right now with an amused smile. "Seems that there are instances where little sisters tend to open up to big brothers when it comes to boys." grinning from ear to ear.

"So I noticed." Sakuya smiled while shaking her head. "Mind if you sleep on the couch for now?" she asked. Crimson eyes fixated on the girl sleeping on the floor.

"Going to recommend it actually." carefully scooping the girl to his arms and settled her down beside Sakuya.

* * *

"I can't believe I slept for almost fifteen hours." Alisa mumbled, running a hand through her silver locks. Making her way on the roof since she can't sleep, again. It was past six in the evening when she came to, embarrassed at the same time that she had been sleeping in Sakuya's room. She couldn't even believe to open up with Lindow like that, she's not that even confident that he'll shut up for it..seeing how Sakuya mischievously smiled when she "Passed." in giving another visit to Raiga.

It's not that she didn't want to, she just have no single idea what she'll do once she faced him. And the constant teasing of the man named Lindow Amamiya is not even helping her for a bit. There is a part of her telling her to try on stepping across the line of friendship. But she chose the latter not to, for now. She'll stay with this until she got all the courage to.

With a few weak slap on her cheeks, she took in a deep breath, she'll manage this..somehow. Lindow did say that there are things better off feeling rather than thinking about it. So, maybe..she'll go ahead and make a visit tomorrow. And she'll take it from there.

"That's it." she smiled to herself, playing with the hem of the hoodie as she makes her way to the roof once again. Also making a mental note to keep her emotions on check for her visit tomorrow, realizing how she suppressed a giggle with the back of her hand. She didn't want to appear odder to her Leader's eyes as she already is..she was called odd by none other than Raiga.

She felt her heart skip a beat when she saw someone upon opening the door. He was facing at the door's direction with eyes closed, as if he was waiting.

Was she hallucinating? He's not yet discharged, but no. She only know one person having that pale hair color.

"Yoh." he greeted casually, looking upto Alisa with those blue eyes that she actually finds captivating. Balling her fists as she noticed that she actually took a few steps closer.

"Surprised?" Raiga grinned playfully at her.

She took all her willpower to stop the heat threatening to creep up to her cheeks, at the same time calming her nerves as her heart thumps faster that she finds the sound of her own heartbeat deafening.

This is not good, she was not prepared for a meeting like this.

* * *

**a/n: and..thanks for dropping by, same as always, reviews are appreciated.. :3**

**and time check here is 12:01am of 06/07/2015..waaahh..i'm out..**

_**_aza**_


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